Turning Tail on Black Friday (And Repenting)

Here's the thing, folks. Just because I believe in Total Depravity does not mean that I wish to be a willing party in displaying its reality to all the watching world. I am, of course, referring to the absolutely insane dash for cash and prizes that Americans term 'Black Friday.' I understand that the name refers to retailers actually making a profit. But believe me when I say that there is evil afoot, and it is a dark and ominous evil; which renders the day's name all to appropriate.

I will confess; I originally intended to go to Walmart at midnight because I heard from their ad that I could get a Buzz and Jessie doll (from Toy Story) for $15 (marked down from $25). These were two toys my wife and I had decided we would purchase for our children for Christmas, and the prospect of saving $20 piqued my curiosity.

So, 11:30 rolls around and I decide I will mosey into Walmart and scope out the situation. The first thing I notice is that all of the carts are gone. A most terrifying omen, indeed. As I enter the store, things were calm and quiet. I thought, "All is well here. Perhaps these Toy Story figurines are in the back of the store." I assumed correctly. As I enter the rear of the store, the first sight I see is about twenty women standing in a circle, surrounding a display case which is covered from top to bottom in black plastic. These women are standing perfectly still, like disciplined soldiers. They are shoulder to shoulder, and there is no room to get between them. You can't even tell what they're waiting for, except for the fact that Buzz Lightyear's arm sees visible through a gap in the plastic.

"Holy moly!" I think. "If I want one of those toys, I have to - what - crawl over these people or something?" The other thought in my head was, "Do I dare join them?" But a glance at my watch told me there were still twenty minutes to go before these midnight sales became available. Now, aside from these women surrounding the display case, there were many more people who had not fully committed to the level the early birds were committed to, because they were all hanging back trying to look all casual. Much like myself, you see.

Further down the length of the store, another even larger crowd had conglomerated around a case of DVDs. Apparently, people were willing to wait in this giant crowd so they could get a copy of Ice Age for $5. Trust me, I've seen the movie; it's not that great. Plus, you could probably find it for $2 on Craigslist if you looked hard enough.

So I turned on my heels and left as fast as I could. There is no way that this was me. I may be one of these people at heart, but I refuse to live like them. I may be an American, but that doesn't mean I have to like it. Other people can fight like animals so they can save a few bucks. As for me, I'd rather turn tail, go home, and blog about it so that I can confirm myself in my self-righteousness.

What I really needed to do is go home and repent of my worldliness and beg God to help me love and not disdain the people in this crowd. I think that's what I'll do right now.